OPEN MIC, MANCHESTER! (Sorry for shouting)

Wah, I couldn't go to the party! Poor me. Sob, whinge, etc.

(Oh, grow up you over-sized infant.)

Please excuse the interminable whining of my last post, I was feeling Glum About Life, a life that contained nothing but shelter, food, love, clothing, art and a large packet of cheese and onion crisps. Oh, woe! How stricken I must have been, as you can imagine.

Today I was in Leeds again, which is similar in damp Northern cheer to Manchester. Although in Leeds everyone calls everyone else 'love', even grown men say it to other grown men. (Or so I have heard.) In Manchester people do say "thanks love", or "stop touching me or I'll bite ya love"*, but it is generally not something that straight, burly chaps say to one another at the pie shop/strip club/sports place.

*Interestingly, this was the first thing I heard anyone say after I left the house this morning. (It was not directed at me.)

Does anyone from Manchester read this? If so, would you like to come to a gig/open mic night this Wednesday, at the Thirsty Scholar? Unfortunately, this is the same night that some excellent poets are putting on their marvellous, poetry-orientated night called Inn Verse, so mine will be more musicky. I don't want to snaffle any of their potential performers. I would like just anyone to come and do whatever it is they enjoy doing on stage. Music, of course, is completely welcome, as is poetry, but I am also open to any other form of expression. Comedy, magic tricks, circus skills? Yes, yes and yes (provided nothing gets set on fire or cut in half). (I mean, you can set the room on fire, but the Health and Safety people really do prefer that you do it in a metaphorical way.)

What will I be doing? I hear you ask (although I heard it very faintly so it's possible I imagined it).

Well I will certainly be telling this joke:

Q. What do you call a racist, bigoted wizard?
A. Nick Griffindor.

When I told this to Ben he paused for a bit after I asked him the 'Q' bit, then said "um, Gandalf Hitler?", which is an excellent answer but loses points for being slightly less topical.

OPEN MIC, MANCHESTER, 25th NOVEMBER!

I am trying to get some Google hits.

OPEN MIC!

I don't think it helps to write it in capitals.

MANCHESTER!

But you never know.

WEDNESDAY 25TH NOVEMBER!

Well, I'm sure there are some people that know, but I don't.

THE THIRSTY SCHOLAR!

I just like feeling like I'm calling out to the Internet.

So, if you're around, come along. If it's more poetry you want, then head to Inn Verse. My night will incorporate more poetry again in 2010.

I hope to see you there. Oh, and if you're here through Google then HI! WELCOME!