Meme-ories

Kelly tagged me (again with the problem with the links, but she is on the sidebar). I am a dutiful blogging-friend so I have obliged.

What were you doing 10 years ago?

Ten years ago I was nearly fourteen. I was probably waking up every morning and telling the nearest person that it was only twenty days until my birthday.

I was living in Harpenden, Hertfordshire. In the room with the bay window that had a sill on which you could sit and read a book. There were house martins nesting outside my window. I went to school, walking ten minutes to get on the bus to travel half an hour to get there. My uniform was a navy skirt, light blue shirt and navy blue jumper. Black shoes, and in winter, black tights.

I was shy but had very outgoing friends who I liked. I played in an orchestra around the corner from my house every Monday, had my cello lessons on Tuesdays, drama after school on Fridays. I think at that point I ran in the cross country team, although I imagine that fizzled out soon after.

Still skinny at that point, freckly, with permanently messy hair. I still have the messy hair, but my freckles only come out in summer. Not so much with the rake-like skinniness, not anymore.

I used to sing, but it was with my older sister, Alex, who plays guitar. We used to sing 'Everybody's Talking', 'Killing Me Softly' and 'April Come She Will'. Other ones as well, always in harmony.

I don't remember much from that age, apart from feeling shy a lot. It seems such a long time ago.

What were you doing 5 years ago?

Five years ago it was April 4th, 2001. I was in Australia, just about to turn nineteen. I travelled with two girls: Jenny and Helen. Helen I knew from school and had accidentally agreed to travel with after A-levels. Jenny had called me up out of the blue about two months before Helen and I were due to depart, to go to South East Asia, Australia, New Zealand and the Cook Islands. After a brief conversation that, I seem to recall, involved the possiblility of us being hookers at King's Cross in order to fund gap year activities, I invited her to join us. She accepted. "Are you sure you don't mind?" she asked. "Of course not!" I replied. "The more the merrier!"

Well, it didn't quite turn out that way. What ended up happening was both Jenny and I were irritated by Helen in a kind of shocked, I cannot believe you just said that to me in public sort of a way, and have been best friends ever since. Helen had a good time, I think, but a very different time.

Helen and I no longer speak.

Anyway. Five years ago we were in Cairns and doing a dive course on the Great Barrier Reef. We decided to do the six day Advanced Padi Course, and stay out on the live-aboard boat for that time. Diving was so very wonderful. It is, in fact, difficult to talk about diving without using clichés. Oh, it's like flying! Oh, the fish! Oh, the coral! It is as good as that, though. The least fun part was the night dive. Standing on the dark boat, fully-attired and flippered, staring into the water which was all lit up by a huge beam of light from underneath the boats. The fish, attracted by the light, flock towards it in their hundreds. Then, attracted by the fish...

"Are they...? Is that a...?"

"Yeah, mate, that's a shark! In we go!"

Um, alright then. I heard they were, you know, a bit dangerous. I usually avoid them, on a day to day basis. But, hey, you're the big strapping Australian! You know best!

As a general rule I loved the diving. When we weren't on the boat we stayed in a hostel, which was great except that the owner kept trying to undo my bikini top in the swimming pool.

I would love to be there now. I don't mean in that swimming pool, with that owner, although now maybe I'm more assertive and so would just elbow him sharply in the ribs and/or testicles. No, I mean I would love to be in Australia. With my best friend. Having fun.

What were you doing 1 year ago?

Trying to get over a broken heart. Trying to get over depression. Trying to work out where I wanted to go with my singing. Living at home with my parents and commuting to London everyday. Looking forward to my twenty-third birthday. Or trying to.

5 Snacks you enjoy:

Rice cakes with humous and pesto
Brannigan's Beef and Mustard crisps
Chocolate hobnob biscuits
Salt and vinegar Snack a Jacks (rice cakes)
Apples

5 Songs (you think) you know by heart:

Summertime
My Funny Valentine
Angel Eyes
America (Simon and Garfunkel)
The Fresh Prince Of Bel Air rap (because I'm massively cool)

5 things you would do with a LOT of money:

Set up my own studio and record label
Pay off the debts of my family and anyone who was nice to me
Donate to lots of charities
Buy shoes shoes lots of shoes
Buy Hugh Jackman and keep him as my sex slave

5 Things you would never wear:

Peaked woollen caps
Half tops
Things without bra-support
Once I saw a girl wearing Kappa tracksuit trousers and snakeskin high heels. I would never wear that.
Nasty things. It's tricky to narrow down, really.

5 Things you should have never worn:

Cycling shorts
High heeled jelly shoes
Pink shell suit
Tapered jeans
Half top/hotpants combination

5 Things you enjoy doing:

Singing
Reading
Blogging
Socializing
Ahemyouknowwhatting

5 Bad Habits you have:

Being anxious
Overcompetitivity
Drinking too much coffee
Spending money on things I don't need (I very very nearly bought the Charmed series six box set last night for £45. I don't need that and will not succumb. Except that I do and I will.)
Loving Charmed too much

5 People you would like to do this:

Everyone. I know this is cheating, but my server won't let me create links within words and I am too tired and oh, whatever.

Just quickly:

Last night's CBT was good except that I had a panic attack at the beginning. She said that this was to do with facing my fears, and being confronted with the things I am really struggling with. I think she's right. I feel like I am getting closer to being brave enough to make the changes I want to make in my life. This sounds all a bit cryptic and mysterious, but it's not. Nor is it actually as exciting as it sounds.

Also, I hope you're having a nice day today. It is sunny here and I am going to make Important Phonecalls. I also need to work out what to do for my birthday, which is April 24th. I will be twenty-four years old. Please suggest things.

Perhaps things will start changing. Perhaps today.