Monday, February 06, 2006

From Sport to Stripping in one little post.

This weekend I have done the following:

- Watched a sporting match (rugby) (England vs Wales) without falling asleep, dying inside or asking stupid questions to entertain myself and annoy others (examples: "why is the ball the wrong shape?", "was that a goal?" "why do you care? It's just a game.") I did drink beer, though, which I feel helped. Every so often Bec (Wales fan) would turn to me and tell me useful-but-guaranteed-to-go-straight-over-my-head information about the game and the players and I would look blankly at her and think about shopping until she stopped being useful. We ended up having a really nice afternoon, and we made some new friends in the pub. Three guys, one of whom was really into the rugby, and had conversations with Bec about, like, balls or something, and another of whom had no interest in the game but liked drinking, so we had enough in common to have some good chats. I think that my ability to talk utter shit helps in these situations, and also my fondness for inappropriate jokes mostly goes down quite well. At one point we were discussing the possibility of picnicking on hillsides and how it might work. My position is that as long as you steer well clear of round things (satsumas, for example, or particularly round bread rolls) you'll be ok. This may have been after one or two pints of The Kronenbourg.

- Went to a Sex Variety Cabaret. This is way, way better than rugby. There was wine, as well, of which I am a big fan. My friend Gemma (stage name Lily Dumont) was performing. She is a burlesque performer (those not in the know: burlesque is kind of vaudeville, music hall performance, involving things like nipple tassels and big fans. It is kind of tongue-in-cheek saucy in a Carry-On style, and really, really cool) and she is FABULOUS. Her performance on Saturday night was great: funny, saucy and brilliant. It was at Battersea Arts Centre in a studio-type theatre, and the audience loved her. Her act involved stripping and nipple tassels, as well as comedy. Oh I loved it. The other acts were good (a belly-dancing man and some stand-up being examples) but I am not being biased when I say that Gemma/Lily was the best.

- Tried the nipple tassels. I can TOTALLY do it. Make them twirl. I showed my housemates and Gemma said it was good, so I was rather pleased with myself. I obviously sat down and put it straight on my CV.
I am going to get some of my own, though, and go on a workshop that Gemma is running in London to do it properly. I have toyed with the idea of incorporating burlesque in to my own perfomance-style and I think I'm going to run with it and see what happens. That's not to say that I would do whole burlseque performances and strip all the time, but I would like to add the knowledge of it to my frame of reference and see how I can incorporate it into my singing.

- Had loads and loads of fun. Something fun is happening tonight, as well, but I will tell more about that soon.

If anyone else had a nipple-tassel based weekend I would be fascinated to hear about it. Bet you're not as good as I am, though.

Look! Here is the workshop my friend Gemma (Lily) is running!
I am signing up, definitely.


Blogger Doug said...

Now the real question is what colors to wear for the stripping....I think red might be appropriate now :)

2:29 pm

Anonymous number1hypocrite said...

Nipple tasseling?!

It's my favorite hobby!

... No, not really. But I'd imagine it'd be fun to see done in person. I would think that you'd be good at it, so I don't doubt your claims.

(Don't take that the wrong way.)

3:49 pm

Blogger Dancinfairy said...

No nipple tassles for me but I can say that there was plenty of vini rosso della casa for me in Italy.

And sunshine. Plenty of that ;o)

Glad you had a fun weekend

5:45 pm

Anonymous Erica said...

Hi Leonie! I know this is going to sound really strange but I was in London recently (am from America) and met a Leonie through my boyfriend's flatmate. I just randomly found your blog from another Londoner's blog recently and I keep wondering if you're the same person ...

2:20 am

Blogger CP said...

Sadly, with breasts my size, leonie, I would surely take out an eye...or seven.

Why twirl tassels when I can twirl my own udders??


2:27 am

Blogger Léonie said...

Doug - recalling your pervious comment about the "leave the $50 on the nightstand..." nature of red underwear, I think you might have the wrong impression of me. I am not, repeat NOT going to be a lapdancer and/or surprisingly cheap hooker. This is performance not whorishness.

Number1 - I KNEW it! I only wrote that whole post to bait you so that you'd come out and admit that you're a secret nipple tassel king. I'm a genius.

DancinFairy - Mmmm. Vini rosso della casa is almost as good as tassels, only perhaps with a few less sequins.

Erica - Um... Not sure! There are photos of me somewhere on the blog so you can see. I have a RUBBISH memory especially if I have drunk some things. If you go to the September archives and scroll down there are photos. I hope it was me! That would be cool.

CP - That's what I said, though, and was assured that Big Breasts Are Fine For Tassels. Trust me. I have seen evidence (read: myself in the mirror).

1:03 pm

Anonymous Bec said...

I was witness to this fabled nipple-tasseling on Sunday and can only comment that the better endowed figure can certainly give it a whirl and Leonie is all about art and definitely not cheap hookerishness (though she is all about cheap gags about monkeys in a bath...)

1:49 pm


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