Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Whine. Not as fun as Wine.

The tube has made me ill.

I am fairly sure it is the London Underground's fault that I have a cold and am therefore going to sue them for millions and millions of pounds. They can just get rid of, say, the Waterloo and City Line. I don't think anyone uses that one really.

I also have inexplicable stomach pains.

I think it's because I always secretly hope that the figure skaters fall over, and I am being punished for it.

If I was a figure skater I would fall over. In fact, I know that if I was a figure skater I would probably spend the whole time choosing my costume and forget to actually make up a routine. I would get out onto the ice and then panic and break out into some kind of expressive arm-based movement, then fall over and slide about on my arse for a little bit, hoping that people were sufficiently dazzled by my sequins that they wouldn't notice the gross incompetence.

I think I shouldn't become a figure skater.

Not when my stomach hurts like this.

I have promised to go out this week, tomorrow and Thursday. Tonight I was meant to be going to see Kayne West at Hammersmith Apollo but I feel like shit, and the ticket was a comp through work anyway. I am also at some point supposed to be going to meet this producer I've done some singing with. He's 'checking his schedule' as we speak.

This is good, but I can't help feeling a bit ill and it's sort of stressing me out a little.

Also tired, because the stomach pains kept waking me up last night. Between the pain and the trains roaring by about ten metres from my bedroom window, the sleep was erratic.

Usually the trains are fine, I sleep through the noise provided I'm not woken up by something else.

I am whinger today, aren't I? You shouldn't listen to it, you'll only encourage me.

As usual I don't know how to make it better, and I am turning to you, the pretty Internet, for help and advice. So perhaps don't lurk, and tell me what to do. Don't say figure skating, though.

At least it's not Valentine's day again this week! For that I am immensely grateful.

12 Comments:

Blogger Adz said...

The tube is evil - I have tried to take legal action against them on numerous times, only to be coughed in the face. I fondly remember some man sneezing all his snot actually in my face once, I got a cold 2 days later. They should keep the Waterloo & City line, it can be useful, but scrap the District line, I hate it!

Tips for feeling better? Take lots of Echinacea, get lots of sleep, eat bad things (chocolate, crisps, cola) and you should be back on your feet in no time.

A more trustworthy method is lots of Lemsip Max, works wonders!

1:43 pm

 
Blogger lady miss marquise said...

I have a big black cloud over my desk, and I am in world's most rotten mood... so lots of stomping around and looking menacing.

But I will take a much needed break from my own misery to send you a huge hug, and hope the cold goes away very VERY quickly.
Cold hard drugs are the answer. And lots of lavendar and peppermint oil to make you feel a little more holistic x

2:21 pm

 
Blogger Dancinfairy said...

Night Nurse. Lots of it. Will help you sleep at night and it makes things inexplicably (sp?) funny during the day due to much floaty headness and fun stuff like that.

If that doesn't help then laugh at the fact that when it is on I dance around my front room trying to copy the routines with much arm waving and jumping.

If neither of these help then go and look at the pretty pictures of mountains on my blog. Get well soon x

2:59 pm

 
Blogger Ant said...

Hmmm, you haven't contracted something from your face being in the crotch of smelly men on the tube have you?

And oh god yes - Night Nurse is the answer. A few chasers just before bed and you may never wake up, but you won't care because the sleep will be so lovely...

Get well soon.

3:23 pm

 
Anonymous Euan said...

Advice.

I have been assured that for most *ahem* lady pains, the strongest thing you can get without perscription is Feminax. Don't get FeminLax, because that will make you feel entirely different altogether.

Incidentally, it's good for all sorts of pain like headaches and such, so fellows can take it too, except strangely no-one seems to ask for it...

6:31 pm

 
Blogger monkey typist said...

i was going to write something helpful but am instead giggling at what euan said

8:43 pm

 
Anonymous number1hypocrite said...

I, too, constantly hope for figure skaters to fall over. I cheer and point and laugh when they do. I think they should get more points for falling.

4:12 am

 
Blogger Dancinfairy said...

What you should do is come to Adz's so very awesome 80's party (saw your comment about his invite) and laugh at people in polka dots with crimped mullets and legwarmers. And that'll just be me!!!

12:41 pm

 
Blogger Swedish Girl said...

Well, God created blogs so that we could whinge, didn't he?

Hope you feel better soon, and that no crazed ice-dancer will come after you wielding an ice-skate as a weapon and wheeze:

"You shall pay..."

Or is that just my own personal nightmare?

If that happens, don't worry. Just put on a CD with The Final Countdown by Europe and they will by law be required to start twirling like mad dervisches.

Oh, and good luck with the producer!

1:10 pm

 
Blogger hen said...

You need to find and achieve the karmic opposite of hoping a figure skater falls which is probably something like… helping a circus dwarf down with a cookery book.

Do that you’ll be fixed in a jiffy.

8:18 pm

 
Blogger Miss Devylish said...

Ooh.. ow.. I'm worried for your little tummy. Could it be heartburn or ulcers? Please say no.. but honestly, I never thought I'd say this, but I get heartburn and it hurts my tummy all the time. Too much coffee and chocolate and spicy food.. sometimes all at the same time. I say it's worth it, but the dr says um.. hi, it can lead to uclers so stop it. So um.. are you doing any of that?

And Airborne (I don't know if you have this where you are, but I'll send you some!) is the BEST THING EVER for the ending the beginnings of colds.. it really really is! Honest! Get some! And I hope you feel better soon!

5:29 am

 
Blogger appu said...

Spiderman homecoming Public Holidays 2017
Happy New Year 2017 SMS
enem 2016 resultado
cat 2016 result
new year 2017 wallpapers
resultado enem 2016
Diwali Wishes
Happy Onam Images Happy Onam wishes Whatsapp Status for Christmas Christmas Whatsapp Status

7:34 am

 

Post a Comment

<< Home