SUCH a cop-out. I know.

Instead of a post today I thought I'd copy and paste some snippets of emails and some whole emails that I found whilst browsing through my hotmail inbox. It's an activity that cheers me up. Mostly. I have strange friends. I meet nice and strange people. And some not so nice. I am not going to write context. Or correct spelling mistakes.


'leonie am so hung over ihave to leave this sodding room, got in at foour threw up and have been doing sodding drama texts all day and im about to crumble. will email tomorow when head isactually on my shoulders not up my arse,miss you loads say hi to jen love kay xxxps can not beleive your a dinner lady!!! do kids spit at you??? xxx'



'I had to write to Tim to get your e-mail. He asked me if I wanted all of them or just yours, what a weard question. Why would I want to write to the other two girls, that's just plane old silly.
How was your diving anyway, I do actually hope you enjoied it. you were going to Brisbane, right. Then you should visit Harvey Bay and Frasier Island and Byron Bay. In Harvey Bay I would recommend Smuglers rest. The staff was very frindly and very laid back. I didn't go to Byron Bay because it was full due to the easter holiday. I'll have to go now, since i'm out of coins. It's a very strange system.
Maybe I'll see you later or -if I'm lucky- maybe not.
Love Kasper.'


'I hope it all went brilliantly and that you are a few short steps away from mega stardom, but in a cool-jazzy-soulful-funky kinda way rather than a Britney Spears kind of shitty way. You know what I mean.'

'I want to try and apologise for the way I treated you... All I'm asking for is your friendship, and for you to forgive me for treating you so appaulingly.' (Editor's note: HA HA HA your spelling is shit)

'Let me know please. Actually, no pleases, I demand that you let me know and that the answer is positive. The Almighty Lord of Beer and Merriment'


'Flicking through my little book I find your email address above a badly drawn picture of an eye and mouth and opposite a poem about shining light into men's hearts signed with a skull and cross bones.'

'i think it's very bad that i've been back in harpenden for five or six weeks now and you've insisted on living in london. i want lally and jenny time biatch! what about this weekend? we could meet in london for lunch or something if you are free? or dinner even?'

'Is she a loser because she cries or because she is dressed like a fairy and is dancing for your entertainment whilst, at the same time, being a dog?'

'I am supremely, mind-numbingly bored. Game?'

'And the denial that your ‘little nip’ was actually an action of stubbornness and evilness astounds me…you hurt me bad but I’m over it and I forgive you…it’s time to forgive yourself!'


Bit bored of doing that now. Thanks for saying nice things yesterday, by the way. I'm still feeling a bit funny. I had a bit of chocolate earlier, though, which seemed to help things a little. It was only a single chocolate out of a box, so it didn't compound the ohmygodI'msofat feeling. I had coffee with a friend this lunchtime, which also helped.

I wish I didn't feel so fucking rubbish, though.